Speechy pie

Maybe I'll post my speech here. I don't really like it... And maybe you people reading it wouldn't like it either... But  whatever. Comment if you want me to put my speech on here or not.Or just about anything else.

PLEASE COMMENT!!!

I know this is in the beginning, and there aren't many stories and it's not that funny, but I only have one comment (thanks Kay Kay!!! I like your blog too!!!) and I'd like some positive feedback or some similar stories of yuor own or constructive criticism or ANYTHING ELSE you have to say!!! I have over 150 views (which half of that is me, but, well... I can't really help it when I'm editing it myself) and only one comment.
Is just one comment from my readers too much to ask???

P.S. I don't want this to be a mean post or anything, I'd just like to know what you people think. I really love it when a new person sees it and I've already had viewers from Australia, the US and the United Kingdom, and of course here (Canada!!! YAY!!!).

I'm going to see if I can make a Canadian flag, just to make this fun.

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YAY CANADA!!!!

(Yeah I know... It's horrible.)

UPDATE: Here is my speech, if anyone wants to read it. (Oh, and sorry if it's kinda long... But it had to be three-five minutes. It was about 3:30 when I read it to the class.)

Speech

Stereotypes

You all know stereotypes. Especially for us Canadians. Like that we drink maple syrup, play hockey all the time, ride polar bears everywhere, and it’s always cold here, eh? They’re certainly funny, but not always true. Honourable judges, teachers, and fellow students, my speech is about stereotypes.

Here’s a definition from the Urban Dictionary: ‘A stereotype is a commonly-held view about a particular group of people, like a nation, social group, gender, religion, et cetera. Stereotypes are often incorrect or offensive.’ This means that many people think of a group by the same perspective, either in a good or bad way. Like how people think that Asians are smart, for example. Some people think of that as good, so they admire Asians, while other people will be jealous and think it’s not fair.

Stereotypes are usually made by someone noticing or assuming something about a certain group of people or person who is different from them self. They tell other people about it, and eventually a lot of people end up believing this assumption and morph this information into completely different ideas, and a stereotype is formed.

On a website where a person asked how stereotypes are made, someone answered: “Small, narrow-minded people just grouping certain types of innocent "apples" into the same barrel as the rotten ones. It's easier just to hate ALL of "them", than to see the big picture.” I really like this definition and I think it describes well how stereotypes come to be what they are.

There are three steps to stereotyping. First, we develop social categories and assign traits to those categories. For example, we could say that teachers are intellectual and strict. Second, we put people in the groups based on easily observable information about them, such as their gender or physical appearance. Third, people who seem to belong in a certain group are assigned the traits that were associated with the group. Using the previous example, we could say that if someone was a teacher, they are definitely intellectual and strict.

Stereotypes can be subconscious, so that they bias our decisions and actions. Even people who consciously don’t want to be biased are affected. So people who think they’re being equal to everyone and not agreeing with stereotypes, might be wrong. Personal experiences shape stereotypes to some extent, but they are mainly provided to us through cultural upbringing and media images.

Stereotypes are spread on the media and TV shows a lot. The people being stereotyped don’t have much to say in the matter. They’re just actors, after all. But the stereotypes can spread negative feelings about a group of people.

Every reality TV show that features teenage girls shows stereotypes, like how blonds are stupid, that every teenage girl is thin and pretty, and that the ‘popular people’ are mean and only want to make the non-popular people feel stupid, ugly and horrible.

Stereotypes aren’t just about race or gender or other mainly known stereotype groups. Think about someone from a different city, or who supports a different sports team than you, or is in a different class at school. We have our own stereotypes about them. And it’s not always what we know. It’s sometimes what people tell us, and what we believe or make up ourselves.

We all know that most stereotypes aren’t true, and we shouldn’t get mad over them, and definitely not believe all of them. There’s usually just a little bit of truth in stereotypes, but it’s been changed many times and added to, so it’s not as true as it used to be.

So if you’ve heard all of the stereotypes for all different religions, races, nations, genders, and anything else you can be stereotyped for, one thing must be true: If I’m a person then I must be stereotyped... Thank you.

UPDATE: I got my speech mark today!!! I got an 84%. YAY!!!!

Bad hearing with cows!!!!

Okay, I had the worst hearing again a few hours ago. Here's the conversation between my little sister Ness and I:

Ness: Wow. I was on the iBook app on my iPod, and I saw this dictionary thing, and it has the worst definition for a cow.


Me: What does it say?


Ness: Cow: noun. A small, domesticated, carnivorous mammal with soft fur, a short snout, and retractile claws.

(I was thinking, "Small? No... And I didn't know that cows had claws... Wait, carnivorous?  I don't think so.")

Ness: It is widely kept as a pet or for catching mice, and many breeds have been developed.

(Now I was really confused.  I was thinking, "Umm... They don't catch mice... What kind of cow catches mice? I mean, REALLY!!!!
And as far as I know, only two breeds of cow exist... The black and white kind, or the brown kind.")

Ness: Felis Cowus, family Felidae (the cow family); probably domesticated in ancient Egypt from the local race of wild cow, and held in great reverence there.

Ness: The cow family also includes the ocelot, serval, margay, lynx, and the big cows, like tigers and lions.

(Now this is when I finally understood [or at least things made more sense] that she wasn't talking about cows.)

Me: Wait.. Tigers??? Why would tigers... Cows... WHAT??? Are you actually talking about cows? I'm so, sooo confused...

Ness: (laughing) Cows??? I said cats!!!

Me: Oh... Um... Okay.
 

Your hair is hairy

Some things you can describe by saying what they are, like 'Your legs are leggy' or 'That book is booky'. Maybe even 'That purple is purpley.' (Well, they're not that good examples... but yeah. nI couldn't really think of much else.) Other things you can't. They might have different meanings or just sound weird. Like:

'Your hair is hairy.' (Ha!!! That one's my favourite!!!)

'Your arms are army.' (Whoa, your arms are in an army? Wow. Navy? Air force?)
(maybe insert picture of super strong arms, with army/navy hats on the muscles)

'Your sweat is sweaty.' (You would have to be really sweaty for someone to say that to you.)
(insert picture of  sweat, then close up with sweat on it, smiley faces)

'That fridge is frigid.' (You must have a really cold fridge.)
(insert picture of fridge with icicles on it and a frowny face)

'Your eyes are 'eye-y.' (That one sounds REALLY weird.)

You can actually use these responses in real life. I have. Especially the 'Your hair is hairy' one!!! Hee hee!!!

UPDATE: Sorry for the things like 'insert picture here', just ignore them. I'm going to add in pictures when I have time... I have to do my speech right now so I can't really work on this... Oh well.

Dream I had when I was little

One time, when I was four years old, I had this really weird (well actually only kinda weird, I've seen and heard about weirder) dream that I will always remember. It was like this:

My parents, older sister and I were in this computer store but it didn't have any computers or anything, just an empty store. There were big windows on the wall that had the front door on it, and it was mainly just concrete and gray-ness for the floor and walls. I have no idea why we were there, but it was a dream, so whatever.

My older sister (who was 6 at the time) and my mom went to the front desk and started talking to the guy.

Daddy was reading a newspaper. He was walking around. I didn't really notice him, or at least I can't remember it that much, because it was a dream, after all.

I was walking around too, when I saw Daddy falling down the stairs. Except, it wasn't really falling... I don't really know how to describe it. It was weird.

 

I glanced over and I was like "OMG!!! I have to save Daddy!!!!" And I rushed over.

For some reason the stairs were falling into an endless abyss near the bottom really quickly. I knew I had to act fast if I wanted to save Daddy. He didn't even notice any of this though, he was just reading his newspaper, acting like nothing strange was happening at all. But, it was a dream, so I guess it's okay. Slightly. Kind of. Maybe. Not really.
OKAY!!! Back to the story!!!!

So anyway,  I was like "NOOO!!!!" and I rushed over. I started doing all of these flips and somersaults that were completely unnecessary and I can't (and couldn't) even do in real life, but yeah.

So I was going down the stairs and Daddy was still doing those weird flip things and I grabbed him just as the stairs fell out from under his feet and I saved him. Supposedly you forget colours quickest after a dream finishes but I still remember that the walls were gray and the bottomless pit had this weird reddish-orange light coming up from the bottom. And my hair was blond (it still is... But it was lighter back then, like platinum blond). I think I might have been wearing purple or blue.

Anyway, we came up back to the top of the stairs but I don't remember anything else because I woke up.

When I woke up, I found that I was on the floor halfway across the room. Probably because of all of that dream-flipping.

Harries

Today I was writing a thing at school, and I had to write about Harry's father (in the little story thing) and I wrote:

Obviously I wrote more than just that, I'm not that stupid... But this was just an example.
I didn't realize that I pluralized it wrong until later when my friend pointed it out to me and I was like, "No!!! This is RIGHT!!! I know because I wrote it!! Just look... *looks at the paper* Oh."

I know it's not that funny... But I wanted to write it. I thought it would be hilarious!!! I was thinking about it at school and I wrote "BLOG!!! - Harry's and Harries" and then my teacher put a "?" (question mark, for those of you who might be blind) (or deaf) (or something else like dyslexic or something... Why does 'dyslexic' have such weird letters?? It's so confusing, and it would probably make the dyslexic people have a harder time. No offense or anything.) Then I actually did write it and realized it isn't that funny or anything, but I had already written it and drawn a picture so I didn't want to erase it.

So yeah.

(This is how I normally end my emails too. I'll say something and not want to just end it there, so instead of a closing sentence like 'see you tomorrow!' or 'this email is getting long, so bye!!' I'll put 'So yeah. From Tiff')

So then... Yeah.

Sharp Lives

I hear things weirdly. I often interpret things differently than people mean. Like, just an hour ago my mom said "Little girls shouldn't handle knives!!!"
And, of course, I thought she said "Little girls shouldn't handle lives!!!"
Which really confused me.
I replied, "Ummm... Lives? What's so bad about a life??"
And she said, "No... Knives. The sharp, pointy things? You cut stuff with them?"
"Oh. Yes. Okay." I said.

Then a little while later, she said "Don't touch the sharp knives!!!"
And then my older sister, who had been listening the first time, said "No!!! Sharp lives!!!"

And then LATER later, my older sister and I were pointing at each other and then she grabbed a Kleenex box to throw at me (my influence, I used to do throw Kleenex boxes all the time) and I said "Oh yeah, well I've got a SHARP LIFE!!!!"

Comprcomprehensibleehend

About words, my friends and I once found a typo in a French-English dictionary. It was like this:

comprcomprehensibleehend

It was one of those words at the top of the page that show you what kind of words are on that page.

We were like, "What???"

I think it was actually supposed to be 'comprehensible' and 'comprehend', but it was mixed together.

Like:

comprcomprehensibleehend

Words that should exist

I decided to write another post. I'm not sure what to write about, but I'll figure it out soon. I just felt like writing something, and I wanted people to have something to read if they come to this website. So that people aren't like "What the heck is this??!??!?! Only four posts??? Two of them useless??? NOOOO!!!!!"

Words that should exist:
Laughy (laff-ee) - When you laugh a lot, or feel the need to laugh. "I was feeling laughy, so I laughed."
Glarf (gl-arf) - You can use it for anything. Greetings, farewell, questions, anything. It just depends on your tone of voice. "How are you? Glarf. Do you think this is a good idea? Umm... Gla-arf."

I can't think of any more right now, but I'll post more when I have more thoughts.
Just to let you know, I actually use both of those words frequently. My example sentence for 'laughy' isn't very good, but I wasn't sure exactly what to put for it since it isn't a real word anyway.

Apparently a 'glarf' is a contraction of 'gloves and scarf', according to Google. Wow. That made my made-up word a lot more un-fun. I like my way better. GLOVES-AND-SCARF IS BANNED!!!

No Eyed Freaks

When I was in grade 5, I had this teacher that we called Mr. P. He was a supply teacher for four months because we scared our first teacher away in the first week (she had had previous bad experiences with that class). It was a grade 5/6/7 split, and I know that seems like a lot, but it was really cool and I got to do grade 7 math and stuff!!! YAY!!! I got smarter than all of the other grade 5's. Mmhmm. I felt so proud.

But anyway, I had this friend named (I'm not sure if I can use her name on the internet, so I'm asking her through email and she hasn't replied yet so I'll just put something in brackets whenever I have to use her name) and she was super messy in grade 5. One time, Mr. P told her to clean her desk and when she couldn't get anything out, he turned the whole desk over and everything came out and piled up at least a meter (3 feet, so our American friends).

So anyway, back to what I was talking about, Mr. P pretended to hate (my friend). Not just because of her messy desk, but she and I made up things like messy monsters (the reason for her messy desk), how to turn into a mouflon (mouflon ARE real animals!!) and signs for House Hippo crossings.
So ANYWAY, one time Mr. P decided to annoy her by pretending to be 'colour blind' to blue. So that he couldn't see the colour clue. And it just happened to be the day she wore only blue clothing.
Also, she has blue eyes, so that contributed to that too.
Mr. P ran around all day saying "I can't see you, (my friend)!!! You're a no-eyed, invisible freak!!!"

I made this a lot longer than it had to be. But it was fun!!! And I hope you have fun reading it.

EDIT: My friend actually did email me back and say I could use her name (her name is Charlotte, by the way) and I was going to edit it but I decided that the stuff in the brackets is too funny to change. In my opinion. I don't really know what you think.
Charlotte is the one in the picture with the brown hair, by the way.

Spelling Bee

The other day, my little sister had her spelling bee. Sunday, I think. Anyway, she's in grade 4, so obviously she did the grade 4 spelling bee.
If you don't know what a 'spelling bee' is, and are currently thinking "Vaht iz zis szing yoo caull a 'zpelling beee'?" (I like funny accents), then the following paragraph is for you:
Spelling bee (by my own definition): A group of people trying to spell words. If you spell a word wrong you're out. When you spell a word right you get on to the next round. When everyone else is out then the last person wins.
That was just a brief thing. If you want more info go somewhere else, or search it.

ANYWAY, I'll get on to what I was trying to talk about. Okay, so there was this kid. He was the last kid to spell a word in his round. He got the word 'ancient'.
Oh, and before I go any further, people are supposed to say the word, then spell it, then say the word again to make sure they got the right word.

This is the conversation that went on between him and the spellmaster (the spellmaster is the guy giving the words, just to let you know.):
Spellmaster: Contestant number 51, your word is 'ancient'. The buildings in Greece are very ancient. Ancient.
Kid: Agent?
Spellmaster: No, ancient.
Kid: Anchit?
Spellmaster: No, your word is 'ancient'. AIN-CHUNT.
Kid: Umm... Agenty?
Spellmaster: No. Would you like a definition?
Kid: Yes please.
Spellmaster: Ancient - Of great age, very old. From a time long past.
Kid: Hmm... Ajuncy?
Spellmaster (looking exasperated) : No, I'm sorry, but your word is 'ancient'. ANCIENT. Make sure you get this right. ANCIENT!!!

NOTE: By this time my older sister and I, who were watching, were just about to burst out laughing and fall all over the floor. The other people (mostly adults) in the crowd were like "Heh, heh..." But we were jumping around snorting, trying not to laugh because then we would ruin the spelling bee. I was thinking that they should just give the poor kid another word, but no. They decided to torture him.

Kid: Ann... Ann shit?
Spellmaster (looking angry and annoyed): No... *sigh* Ancient.
Kid: Ancient?

Then just about everyone in the crowd and people walking by who had no idea what was going on were clapping and cheering for about 30 seconds (which doesn't seem like a lot but it actually is in real time).

But the kid still ended up spelling it like 'agent'.

OMG!!! YAY!!!

OMG!!!! SOMEBODY VIEWED MY BLOG!!!!

I know... it's not THAT exciting, and I don't even have anything interesting up yet, but whatever. Hopefully more people will come!!!!

Here's a nice picture to get people coming:

Well, it's not that nice, but my little sister drew it!!! On her iPod!!! Or Pod de I, as we like to call them... We like to pretend we're French, so we'll say things like 'top de lap' instead of laptop, or 'ood de foh' for food, et cetera.

I'll post a new blog post AS SOON as I finish practicing piano. And maybe after piano lessons too.

I don't know.

Beginning

Okay, so I started a blog. I kinda wanted to, just to write stuff and maybe have some people see it. Also because I might want to look back later and be like "OH! I was like THAT then!!!"
I wanted to make a blog because I recently started reading this blog called Hyperbole and a Half, and it's absolutely hilarious!!! I kinda wanted to do something like that. I think I'll put a link to it somewhere here. If I figure out how.
Anyway, I think I'll just write about funny stuff and things that happen and blah. Yes. I made a little list over the past few days to write about. I think I'll try to write something every day or every few days or whatever. Just something.

So... yeah. This is it. I think I'll start an actual blog post tomorrow after school (or maybe even before school) because right now it's almost midnight and I need some sleep. Anyway, good night!!!

(I hope someone actually reads this soon.)